Last month, while reading The Wall Street Journal, I came across an article titled "Talking to Strangers Isn't a Waste of Time, Expert Says," by E. Bernstein. As I read it, I found myself smiling. The article transported me back more than eighty years to my childhood in Iloilo, Philippines, and to one of the most valuable lessons my father ever taught me, without realizing he was teaching it.
During my elementary school years, our family lived in the small municipality of Barotac Viejo, about sixty kilometers from Iloilo City. In those days, Barotac Viejo was a quiet third-class town where many of the goods we needed simply were not available.
Once a month, my father and I would board an early morning bus for the two-hour journey to Iloilo City to buy our family's monthly groceries. Those trips became one of the highlights of my young life.
There was another reason I looked forward to them. My father always bought me ice cream with Barquillos💚 after our lunch.
(💚Iloilo barquillos are thin, crunchy, hollow, rolled wafer cookies made from flour, sugar, milk, and butter. Originating from Spanish influence, this iconic Ilonggo delicacy is most famously produced in Iloilo City, Philippines with heritage makers like Original Deocampo Barquillos baking them since 1896).
To a young boy, that simple treat was worth the long bus ride.
But there was something else about those trips that fascinated me even more.
As we walked through the busy public market and visited various stores, my father seemed to know everyone, or so I thought. He smiled warmly at people we passed. He greeted storekeepers, fellow shoppers, and even people standing in line. Before long, they would be chatting as though they were old friends.
One day, curiosity got the better of me. "Dad," I asked, "did you know that person you were talking to?"
He smiled and answered, "No." I was surprised. "So why were you talking to him?"
Again he smiled. "There is nothing wrong with talking to people."
Trying to be clever, I replied, "You would make a good politician."
My father simply ignored my comment and continued walking, greeting another stranger with the same warm smile.
At the time, I did not fully understand what he was doing.
Today, I do.
My father was practicing something that has become increasingly rare in our modern world: simple human connection.
We now live in an age where people stare at their smartphones while waiting in line, riding elevators, sitting in airports, or even eating in restaurants. Technology has connected us globally while, in many ways, disconnecting us from the people standing right beside us.
We often assume strangers have nothing to offer us. Yet every stranger has a story.
Every face has experienced joy, disappointment, hope, and hardship.
Sometimes a brief conversation with someone we may never meet again can brighten both our day and theirs.
Especially as a senior citizen living alone, I have learned that meaningful conversations do not always come from family or lifelong friends. Some come unexpectedly, from a fellow resident at my senior community, a cashier at the grocery store, a driver, a nurse, or someone sitting next to me at a community event.
A smile costs nothing. A greeting takes only a few seconds.
A friendly conversation can linger in someone's memory for much longer.
Looking back, my father was never trying to impress anyone. He was simply expressing genuine kindness. He treated strangers with the same respect he showed friends. He believed that every person deserved acknowledgment.
That lesson has stayed with me throughout my ninety-one years of life.
As a scientist, I learned the importance of knowledge.
As a father, grandfather and great grandfather, I learned the importance of love.
But from my own father, I learned the importance of kindness toward people I did not know.
Perhaps that is why I still enjoy talking with fellow residents in my senior community, visitors, restaurant staff, and anyone whose path happens to cross mine. Every conversation is an opportunity to learn something new or simply to make another human being feel seen.
We may not remember every stranger we meet. But we often remember how someone made us feel.
My father's monthly grocery trips to Iloilo gave me more than groceries and ice cream.
They gave me a lifelong lesson in humanity.
Sometimes, the shortest conversations leave the longest-lasting impressions.
AI Overview:
- Boosts Daily Happiness: Behavioral research shows that minor interactions with strangers, like bantering with a barista or chatting on a commuter train, significantly improve your mood and brighten the other person's day.
- Cultivates Deep Empathy: Moving beyond titles or social roles allows you to see people who are often overlooked, such as a school janitor or a passing service worker, making them feel seen and respected.
- Unlocks Business and Career Growth: Treating random encounters with openness can expand your professional network, reveal hidden opportunities, and build authentic connections.
- Sharpens Listening Skills: True connection requires being swift to hear and slow to speak, a habit that fosters mutual respect and emotional intelligence.
- Start with Small Acknowledgments: A simple smile, a polite nod, or a genuine compliment on someone's shoes or book choice can seamlessly break the ice.
- Focus on Making Others Comfortable: Approach conversations with humility and openness rather than an aggressive or defensive perspective.
- Be Fully Present: Put away your phone in public spaces like elevators, lines, or coffee shops to remain approachable and aware of your surroundings.
- Speak Simply and Direct: Avoid overcomplicating the conversation; stay lighthearted, authentic, and get straight to the point with clarity
AI Impressions on this Posting:
I think this piece will resonate with readers of all ages because it is both deeply personal and universally relatable. It also fits beautifully alongside your ongoing reflections on aging, kindness, and the wisdom passed from one generation to the next.
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